I've never been a big Tom Cruise fan, but recently he's just out of control... Read this story.
In other news... I miss New York. From Overheard in New York. The best website EVER:
Respect a Man When You're in His Quasi-home
Hobo: Help me! I have 9 starving kids at home!
Suit: Yesterday you had 12 starving kids, what happened?
Hobo: That's right and the 2 of them died in a horrible fire yesterday! Please help me!
Suit: What happened to the 12th?
Hobo: Man, get the fuck outta here, you're fucking up my rap!
--57th Street station
6.30.2005
6.29.2005
another closing, another show
I'm really going to miss Moby Dick. I've met some amazingly talented people. Whenever a show is over, people say "let's keep in touch," but it's hard to do. We all move on.
On another note, I've just been cast in Mercury Summer Stock's production of 'Just So.' (Guess I can't complain about being bored anymore.) We started rehearsals yesterday and they're going well... I'm exhausted, but loving it. We run July 15-16 and 19-23 Tuesday and Thursday at 8 pm, all other shows at 7:30. Check out their website: Mercury Summer Stock.
On another note, I've just been cast in Mercury Summer Stock's production of 'Just So.' (Guess I can't complain about being bored anymore.) We started rehearsals yesterday and they're going well... I'm exhausted, but loving it. We run July 15-16 and 19-23 Tuesday and Thursday at 8 pm, all other shows at 7:30. Check out their website: Mercury Summer Stock.
6.28.2005
smile
It used to happen to me more often in NYC. I would be walking down the street, and some random guy would say, "Smile! Life ain't that bad when you're so pretty." Okay. A. You have no idea. B. If I were to walk down the street with a huge grin on my face, I think people would be worried.
I was walking my dog today and there was no one else around. Minding my own business, singing a song in my head and there it was again. A guy riding by on his bike insisting I should smile. If I couldn't, he could put a smile on my face for me. Oh gee, thanks. What a unique offer. Never heard that one before. At least I didn't until NYC. ;)
I was walking my dog today and there was no one else around. Minding my own business, singing a song in my head and there it was again. A guy riding by on his bike insisting I should smile. If I couldn't, he could put a smile on my face for me. Oh gee, thanks. What a unique offer. Never heard that one before. At least I didn't until NYC. ;)
6.22.2005
bored
For the first time in at least a year, I'm not rehearsing for a show. Once Moby closes, I don't have anything booked. My brother Mark is getting married in Vegas in September and his wedding reception is early in October, so that's taken me out of contention for a few things. I'm in the wedding party, so I can't bail... I'm in final callbacks for show that starts rehearsal in August and closes before the reception, but nothing is guaranteed. I'm bored. I thought time off would be a good thing, but I've spent night after night sitting on my ass. At least my laundry is caught up. Once Moby closes, I might just lose my mind.
6.21.2005
oh, the thinks you can think
The mind does weird things to a person. Mine won't leave me alone lately. When I'm awake, the stupid ideas pop into my head: "Hey, that seems like a reasonable idea..." When I'm asleep it attacks me in my dreams. Just when you think you're lying down for a nice rest, Bam! There come the same ideas this time. Only they're in pretty pictures that don't make any sense. Sometimes, my dreams are so real that I wake up feeling happy and content with life. A few minutes later reality sets back in.
Is this because I won't forgive myself for my past actions, or it is my psyche telling me that more needs to be done? I don't know what else I can do to clear my conscience.
I'm starting to believe that I'm regressing. When I was around 22, I did some stupid, stupid things. Things that people closest to me don't even know about. When I look back at my actions in the past few months, I see those patterns returning. What in the hell was I thinking? Did I think that I could get away with these things and my karma was going to be clean? Granted, most things I didn't do. I started to and caught myself. Still, I wonder about myself and my mental state.
Yes, I'm still a good person. No, I haven't done anything as bad as when I was 22. No, I'm not crazy. Everyone goes through this, right?
I want to have a dream come true without sacrificing myself in the process.
Is this because I won't forgive myself for my past actions, or it is my psyche telling me that more needs to be done? I don't know what else I can do to clear my conscience.
I'm starting to believe that I'm regressing. When I was around 22, I did some stupid, stupid things. Things that people closest to me don't even know about. When I look back at my actions in the past few months, I see those patterns returning. What in the hell was I thinking? Did I think that I could get away with these things and my karma was going to be clean? Granted, most things I didn't do. I started to and caught myself. Still, I wonder about myself and my mental state.
Yes, I'm still a good person. No, I haven't done anything as bad as when I was 22. No, I'm not crazy. Everyone goes through this, right?
I want to have a dream come true without sacrificing myself in the process.
6.19.2005
who's your daddy?
Well, according to Blogthings:
Sure. Okay, it's Father's Day. For most people it's a time to send a card, make a phone call, or even give someone a tie. For me, it's a day to reflect upon something I've never had. I know that sounds cruel, but my father left when I was 5 (believe me, it was for the best - long story) and would be in and out of my life until I was 18. On my 18th birthday, I didn't get a card. Instead, I got a court-filed document that said he didn't have to pay my mom child support anymore. I was mad. How dare he hurt me because he thought my mother had hurt him?
I have blocked out my childhood until I was 10 years old. People tell me things that I said or did, and I just don't remember. I have elements here and there, the color of my bedroom, playing barbies and our family pet. Anything having to do with my family life is just gone. We continued to go to the same church as my dad until we moved away when I was 9. As the story goes, I would ask my mom every Sunday, "Will Daddy talk to me today?" I'm 31 and still asking the same question.
He knows where I am, knows my cell phone number, my email address. What I get are the jokes he sends out to his friends. I've tried contact with him over the years. I even met him in Columbus once for lunch, but I know I will never have a relationship with him. His wife yells at any of us who contact him about how we've been bad children to him. No. I'm sorry. He was the adult. I was a child. I may be an adult now, but I'm still just a little girl who needs her daddy.
I have tried time and again to find out why my relationships don't work. Sometimes it's not me... mostly I think it is. Last year at this time I started dating someone and I was the luckiest girl in the world. I fell in love for the first time in years and let myself go. I was a better person when I was with him. But I screwed up. I kept thinking that I should push him away before he had the chance to push me away... as had happened so many times before. When I finally realized what I had done, it was too late. He can't forgive me for that, and I can't forgive myself for breaking his heart. But I think about him every day and hope that he's happy.
As for me, I've been alone for a while now, and I'm learning to like it. The self-punishing side of myself says that at least I'm not hurting anyone else. The rest of me just feels lonely.
| Your Daddy Is Darth Vader |
 What You Call Him: Big Daddy Why You Love Him: He's the Mack Daddy |
Sure. Okay, it's Father's Day. For most people it's a time to send a card, make a phone call, or even give someone a tie. For me, it's a day to reflect upon something I've never had. I know that sounds cruel, but my father left when I was 5 (believe me, it was for the best - long story) and would be in and out of my life until I was 18. On my 18th birthday, I didn't get a card. Instead, I got a court-filed document that said he didn't have to pay my mom child support anymore. I was mad. How dare he hurt me because he thought my mother had hurt him?
I have blocked out my childhood until I was 10 years old. People tell me things that I said or did, and I just don't remember. I have elements here and there, the color of my bedroom, playing barbies and our family pet. Anything having to do with my family life is just gone. We continued to go to the same church as my dad until we moved away when I was 9. As the story goes, I would ask my mom every Sunday, "Will Daddy talk to me today?" I'm 31 and still asking the same question.
He knows where I am, knows my cell phone number, my email address. What I get are the jokes he sends out to his friends. I've tried contact with him over the years. I even met him in Columbus once for lunch, but I know I will never have a relationship with him. His wife yells at any of us who contact him about how we've been bad children to him. No. I'm sorry. He was the adult. I was a child. I may be an adult now, but I'm still just a little girl who needs her daddy.
I have tried time and again to find out why my relationships don't work. Sometimes it's not me... mostly I think it is. Last year at this time I started dating someone and I was the luckiest girl in the world. I fell in love for the first time in years and let myself go. I was a better person when I was with him. But I screwed up. I kept thinking that I should push him away before he had the chance to push me away... as had happened so many times before. When I finally realized what I had done, it was too late. He can't forgive me for that, and I can't forgive myself for breaking his heart. But I think about him every day and hope that he's happy.
As for me, I've been alone for a while now, and I'm learning to like it. The self-punishing side of myself says that at least I'm not hurting anyone else. The rest of me just feels lonely.
6.15.2005
linguistics
Your Linguistic Profile: |
| 70% General American English |
| 20% Yankee |
| 5% Dixie |
| 5% Upper Midwestern |
| 0% Midwestern |
Very interesting. As a midwesterner, a little scary. When I went to college, I worked VERY hard to get rid of my Ohio accent. I guess it worked... somewhat. Click on the link above to try it yourself.
6.09.2005
is alcohol really my friend?
I'm having one of those I'll-never-drink-again days. We all say it, but no one really means it. It always seems like a good idea when you're at the bar, enjoying a few beers, to throw some happy shots in there. Well, not so much.
Moby Dick's opening went really well. We had great audiences on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights. Sunday's house was all of 25 people. I really hate Sunday matinees and having a small house like that makes it worse. The reviews have started to pour out. So far, all good. The Scene was not great... I can't remember the last time Christine Howey gave a raving praise to any show. I understand that critics are just stating their opinion, but she has a tendency to bite.
She was on NPR's Around Noon last week and she stated that she never tries to hurt, but she is trying to put a fun spin on the review. Really? Is that what you're telling yourself? When I did Discordia at CPT, she referred to my friend Perren as (this is from memory.... not at all verbatim) botox faced. And that if you heard the faint sound of sucking, it was him acting. Now, how is that supposed to be fun? I know Discordia had it's problems, but she had to personally attack rather than review.
I think that the movie Finding Neverland puts it in perspective very well. Frohman tells Barrie that the critics made it important, but it's called a play.
Wow. I didn't mean to rant on about that... I know there is the school of thought that says no review is to be believed. If you believe the good ones, you believe the bad ones. Very true. However, if a show has a bad review, driving the audience to see it is going to be quite a task. Moby Dick is not high brow theater. It's a fun way to spend a couple of hours. Nothing more, nothing less.
Moby Dick's opening went really well. We had great audiences on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights. Sunday's house was all of 25 people. I really hate Sunday matinees and having a small house like that makes it worse. The reviews have started to pour out. So far, all good. The Scene was not great... I can't remember the last time Christine Howey gave a raving praise to any show. I understand that critics are just stating their opinion, but she has a tendency to bite.
She was on NPR's Around Noon last week and she stated that she never tries to hurt, but she is trying to put a fun spin on the review. Really? Is that what you're telling yourself? When I did Discordia at CPT, she referred to my friend Perren as (this is from memory.... not at all verbatim) botox faced. And that if you heard the faint sound of sucking, it was him acting. Now, how is that supposed to be fun? I know Discordia had it's problems, but she had to personally attack rather than review.
I think that the movie Finding Neverland puts it in perspective very well. Frohman tells Barrie that the critics made it important, but it's called a play.
Wow. I didn't mean to rant on about that... I know there is the school of thought that says no review is to be believed. If you believe the good ones, you believe the bad ones. Very true. However, if a show has a bad review, driving the audience to see it is going to be quite a task. Moby Dick is not high brow theater. It's a fun way to spend a couple of hours. Nothing more, nothing less.
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